Bucket full of love.

Future Husband:

I really hope things are hard for you right now like they are hard for me.
I hope that you have to watch someone love someone else,
but honey its ok,
because whoever she is.... isn't me.
So I guess experience the feeling and let me heal it later.
I hope that when I find you, you will never watch me love another.
Because it has to be one of the hardest things to go through.
You have to act calm though,
like everything is ok and you are rooting for the couple to work out,
when really you are dying on the inside just trying to give yourself reasons to keep going.

I do want to say this though,
I hope that staying pure isn't easy for you,
i really do hope its hard.
I hope you have girls throwing themselves at you but you make the decision to be the man I want.
That you think of me when you are tempted.
That you think of the feeling I will receive when you look at me and say "Baby, I saved this for you"
Except maybe I don't want you to say "baby"
cause that would be unoriginal and you best be original.
I hope that you have to watch everyone else lead the life that you THINK you want.
I don't hope this because I want you to have a bad life, or even a hard time, but I need to be able to relate to you one day. I need to be able to know that you went through the same trials and still turned out amazing.
With all this love that no one would take and now you can finally pour it onto me.
Is it selfish to say that I don't even want you to have loved another before me, or at least have someone that excepted that love?
I want you to be walking around right now will a huge bucket filled with untouched love that you continuously try to give away and no one will take it,
and then you find me.
I want you to give me your bucket full of love,
and then I will show you the ocean full of love that I have to give to you.

Ill take your bucket,
if you take my ocean.

Comments

Mother Brown said…
Amazing, amazing. Anna, you write with such incredible honesty that God is so going to bless you and you are going to touch millions of young girls who are trying to stay pure in a demented and sick world. I love you and am excited about your future. Remember, one wing is for me.
Mom
August 26, 2007 at 7:52 AM
Joe said…
You are going to make a man very happy one day.
And you'll be able to look yourself in the eye as well, and be able to say "I did it."

Great job Anna.

:]]]]
August 26, 2007 at 9:10 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Goodbye my brother

Received news today about my brother that has been struggling with addiction for about 5 years now. He had checked into another treatment center yesterday but then this morning his roommates couldn't wake him up this morning and they had found out that he had passed. My mother pulled me and my sister out of yoga class and told us the news. Needless to say we were mortified. It wasn't 5 mins later God started spreaking. God, first and foremost told me He was with me. He was all around me, there was no where that my pain was where God was not. He then gave me a vision of Robert. It was like God was standing in front of me and then Robert popped out from behind Him. So filled with joy and laughter. God made it clear that it was the type of joy he would never receive on earth. It comforted me. God then said "This time, I wanted him". God had told me that He wanted Robert back. He had created Robert and this time He was going to take him. The tears continued but
Read more

Matramony manic

Woah. Going from the previous posts for YEARS of complaining or contemplating love to being ENGAGED?! what a jump. I have been totally humbled through this experience because I always had such choice words from those who went so fast in a relationship. That got engaged and married so quickly, I had a timeline for them. I know how I feel about Bobby and I could honestly date him for 2 years 10 years or 10 months just as long as I am with him. I find the things in him that solidify that we can get through any issue. He has shown me in ways that aren't words that He has the living God inside him and with all that I can trust. Oh the faith of that man. We all really know I came to write this to rant right? Right! In most things in life I have known what to expect. I know that when I go to makeup school I would be dealing with makeup and makeup related people. I knew that when I went into a club I would be dancing and maybe sippin some good stuff. I knew that when someone wanted
Read more

uh uh uh, not so fast

Ok, I don't exactly know where to go with this but I felt lead to write it so I am going to spew out some words on this page. A few nights ago I was invited to go to a show at a local coffee shop in town. At first I wasn't going to go because I knew that if I went I would have to interact with people... most specifically... guys. Don't get me wrong here everyone, I love me so guys. But, when it comes to talking to them I find myself a little "who invited the homeschool girl" with what I say. Not because I am boring or sheltered in someway, but because I clearly have no idea was social appropriateness is about. I wish I could think of an example off the top of my head, but considering its late I might have already laid my brain down to sleep, got it its warm milk and tucked it in. I am sure that my mom can think up some funny interactions with boys, you know the kind of interactions that later she has to convince them that she did NOT lock me in a broom closet wi
Read more