She caught a glimpse of her power

And as I went to run out the door, find the beach and pretend to give my problems to the wind, He said "it is time to find peace and serenity in your home"

So here I am. In an empty, half-way cleaned house wondering, oh why am I here?

Not like why am I on this earth, like the teenage questions which have already been answered. But like why am I here? Like sitting in my room, at my desk, without worship music, and yet so unsettled. My thoughts have not been my own lately. Like the devil has some how found a leak in the line that goes straight to my thoughts. 

"Anna, throw them out, get rid of them, send them away"

and like a boomarang they flew right back.

I had a second to breath and feel like my self again but then, boom, back in the battle. The battle for my own thoughts? Crazy.

Shes crazy
Haven't you heard? Shes crazy.

and I am

I am so crazy in love with Jesus that any thing that gets in the way of me getting to hear my Fathers thoughts about me DRIVES ME CRAZY. Dad?! Where are you? Why do I feel an absence of love? Aren't you there?!?!?!

Yes, I am here.

me too....

Who is that? Who's there??

Don't act like you don't know me....

Dad?! 

Yes

yes

and like a spider that has just entered the room and begins to crawl towards me with fangs dripping with what looks like MY BLOOD

DAD GET IT! PLEASE! KILL IT

No, Anna, you get it. You kill it

But look how big it is, look at how it wants to kill me

And look how powerful you are and that nothing can kill you. 

Anna, kill it.

And as I lung forward, eyes closed, with complete abandon of what I think to be true, I stomp to the ground with every strength within me. 

I peak out

its clear

I look down

theres nothing there

i look under my foot

theres nothing there

I look to Dad

He is everywhere

The devil is only as big as you allow him to be.

Because it is in his nature to lose.






























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